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Shubhra Gupta ,Shalini Gupta

Posted: Apr 26, 2008 at 0106 hrs IST

TASHAN
CAST:
Anil Kapoor, Akshay Kumar, Saif Ali Khan, Kareena Kapoor
DIRECTOR : Vijay Krishna Acharya
Like it’s previous year’s blindingly colour-coded costume dramas, this latest Yashraj extravaganza is also all-dressed-up-and-going-nowhere, taking over two hours to do so.
In fact, Tashan is most strongly like the worst of YRF’s 2007 excesses, Jhoom Barabar Jhoom, where it was not just about the look. It was about The Look. Tashan is JBJ Redux, with a whole bunch of extra ‘the-s’ strewn about the script. So it’s The Anil, The Saif, The Akshay. And, oh yes, The Kareena. It all adds up to The Kaput.
Don’t go searching for a story. Or anything you haven’t seen before. Once you’ve sorted out the characters and their looks, it boils down to one of the oldest Bollywood plotlines — a kid watches her father being killed, and she grows up to take revenge. It’s the heroine, not the her — that’s the twist, see?
Right, now we’ve got that out of the way, let’s get to what the flick (credited to debutant director Vijya Krishna Acharya, but looking like something Aditya Chopra story-boarded, and supervised to within an inch of its life) will give you. Bhaiyyaji (Anil), genus hoodlum, now in Mumbai, originally from Kanpur. Crimson streaked-locks, brown spats, black jackets, occasional cravats. Sits on a throne with a Mona Lisa pix in the background. Wants to learn the English. Jimmy (Saif), call centre exec, and teacher of the very same English. Figure-hugging tees, trademark undies visible over jeans. Bachchan Pandey (Akshay), biggest recovery agent in all Kanpur, whose deepest desire is to serve Bhaiyyaji. And Pooja (Kareena), bad girl-turned-good girl. Acres of alabaster skin, mounds of kajal, skinny jeans.
There’s also a suitcase full of stolen cash (only thousand rupee notes, okay, it’s a huge haul), a script which careers all over India (the money is stashed in such distant points as a Rajasthan haveli, and a Kerala houseboat, creating opportunities to show wildly psychedelic kathakali masks, and stretches of shiny desert). Some clever lines, well timed by the four actors, make you laugh: Akshay’s and Anil’s come from the pool of ‘desi cool’; Saif ‘s from the ‘yo bro’ plank, while the much-publicised zero-sized Kareena, stunning both in kurtas and corsets, gets to swing both ways — she’s speaking the Hindi, and the English. The Amazing, innit?
That’s all, the sum total of what was supposed to be the big Yashraj comeback — three guys, one gal, shucking and jiving. Whatever happened to the story, and the sensibility, you know, the stuff that drives a film? Dude.

Sirf
CAST:
Kay Kay Menon, Manisha Koirala, Sonali Kulkarni, Ranvir Shorey, Rituparna Sengupta, Nauheed Cyrusi
Director: Rajaatesh Nayar
This one could have been called Life in a Metro, Part 2. Four couples, in Mumbai, leading stressed lives, trying to get somewhere.
One couple has a daughter with a hole in the heart: mom and dad work too hard, don’t have enough time for her. Aww. Another is a power couple: advertising honchos, with their own company, climbing the ladder. A third comes to the big bad city from a small town: he is okay with it, she makes faces and cries. Poor thing. And the fourth is the youngest: he is jobless but wants to marry; she does too, but has no money, either.
There’s a story here, even if it’s been done to death. But the film is flat and amateurish, the actors — even those who are always good to watch, like Kay Kay and Ranvir - coming off as ineffective.

SHUBHRA GUPTA
shubhra.gupta@gmail.com

THE EX
CAST:
Zach Braff, Jason Bateman, Amanda Peet, Mia Farrow
DIRECTOR: Jesse Peretz
There are many factors which draw you to The Ex, the foremost being the cast. Braff and Bateman are TV’s better-known comedians, wide-eyed and wider-mouthed Peet is a regular in the low-key funny roles, and Farrow adds a dash of respectability to it all, even though Peretz obviously doesn’t know what to do with her. (Except have her hugging an infant at all times.)
And, for a while, The Ex seems to get it right. Peet and Braff are effortless with each other as a couple who have been together for a long time. Sofia (Peet) and Tom (Braff) don’t have great chemistry, but it’s easy to see what attracts one to the other.
However, the film starts falling apart when Bateman enters the picture. As Sofia’s one-time fling in high school who ends up as Tom’s boss, you know Chip (Bateman) can’t harbour friendly feelings towards Tom. It doesn’t help that Chip is in a wheelchair and works at an advertising firm where they throw around an imaginary ball to show gamesmanship.
That’s not to say that Bateman isn’t good. It requires some talent to make yourself hateful when the rest of the world is supposed to look at you sympathetically — as Tom helpfully notes — but the creepy, malevolent and scheming Chip manages it. However, his role is so over-the-top and one-dimensional that Chip only drags the rest of the film down with him.
Peretz doesn’t try to go for the cheap wheelchair jokes, and one has to be thankful for it. It’s also a relief that a child actor — a real prodigy in the making — is spared before he becomes overbearing. It’s sad Bateman isn’t spared the same fate.
Nothing burns like an old flame, says the film’s tagline. Unfortunately, hardly anything burns out faster.

SHALINI LANGER
shalini.langer@expressindia.com

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