The girlfriend, when we started dating in 2004, looked at me incredulously when I asked her if she would like to come out for a Valentine’s dinner bash. “I refuse to let some corporate capitalist cash in on our love — and do not even talk to me about Archie’s cards and trinkets,” she said, fuming. I have been thinking about what she said for the past four years and have not been to an Archie’s store, for the record.

Another queer feminist friend once narrated an amusing story: “Once I was kind of dating this cute transgender female-to-male person,” says the 32-year-old human-rights lawyer.

“He looked a lot like Shah Rukh Khan and I couldn’t get over the way he gazed tenderly into my eyes and held my hand for many dates — I have usually moved beyond hand-holding by the third date. But then he asked me ‘to get serious’ on Valentine’s Day! I left the city and did not return till he got the idea out of his head,” she guffaws.

In short, many feminist lesbians think Valentine’s Day is just not politically sound. Many find it a good time to protest and make their demands heard. “Why should we celebrate when we do not have our basic human rights in place?” says Meenakshi Reddy who works with autonomous women’s groups around issues of gender and sexuality.

When the NGO Humjinsi was functioning, it used to be a practice to go to colleges and talk about the different shades of love. “At the time, we used to say that Valentine’s Day is about love, and it’s time to accept that same-sex couples can also love. While celebrating that day, one should also celebrate diversity,” says Shruti who works at Tata Institute of Social Science.

Living in the day and age that we do, fighting for the queer cause on Valentine’s Day is not the only issue to push. After the recent attacks on women in a Mangalore pub by the Sri Ram Sene, women’s groups, women on Facebook and reportedly a few men too have joined the Pink Chaddi campaign.

“It doesn’t matter that many of us have not thought about Valentine’s Day since we were 13 — if ever. This year let us send the Sri Ram Sene some love on February 14. Let us send them some pink chaddis. Look in your closet or buy them cheap. Dirt-cheap and make sure they are pink. Send them off to the Sena,” says the mail that has been circulated among almost 1,300 people who are part of a group now casually called the consortium of Pub-going Loose and Forward Women.