Brag Lonier says the technique is very popular at the workshops she conducts but it is "often misunderstood, because its name implies `boring'". Actually, if used skillfully, this conversational technique is neither lengthy nor boring.

A FMB is a well-prepared series of phrases about yourself that become a natural part of your conversation. Sound false? It's actually something we do all the time, only we are not aware of it.

Answering "What do you do?" Most independent professionals are frequently asked, "What do you do?" For unprepared small business professionals, this awkward moment can be a lost opportunity to gain new customers or to learn something that can benefit their businesses. With a FMB, you have a prepared response. The FMB is so called not because it has to last that long but because it prepares you to be confident and able to speak comfortably about yourself and your business for up to five minutes, if needed.

Brief encounters become big wins: Thinkof situation where you have only minutes to connect with someone who could be incredibly valuable to your business. Perhaps you're sharing a cab ride somewhere, or an elevator, or a brief conversation at a party. Chances are, if you are not prepared, you will spend that time chatting about "safe" topics, such as the weather or current events. Armed with a FMB you will be able to convey how successful your business is becoming and your future plans.

Practice pays off: To prepare this powerful verbal tool, write down a list of everything you would like someone to know about you and/or your business. Then practice saying some of these things in a conversational tone, out loud. It is very important that you verbalize these thoughts. Because when your mouth speaks the words, powerful things begin to happen. You begin to say and hear these terrific things about your business and you begin to believe them. Your confidence grows, and your business will, too.

No, means not now

You have the skills but youmust overcome a fear of rejections, say the Edwards couple. Whether it's being turned down for a bank loan, being passed over for a contract, or having another manuscript rejected by a publisher, making it on your own usually means coming face-to-face with rejection. No one likes it, but everyone has to deal with it.

Begin with a list of questions you can ask yourself. They've become standard tools of our trade, as valuable to us as our personal computer:

Do you still want to do the work you're doing?

When faced with repeated rejection, you're often tempted to say something like "Hey, I don't need this!" And of course, you're absolutely right. As your own boss, you don't have to put up with anything, unless you want to. You have choices. You didn't have to start this business. You're free to quit. Is that what you want? Yes, then how much do you want to do it?"We've found that the more rejection a particular venture involves, the more you need to want to do it. So, test your resolve. Use a scalefrom one to ten, one is the lowest level of enthusiasm, ten the highest. We've found that under eight scores mean you don't want it enough to stick through the long-term rejection many ventures require: you owe it to yourself to get out."

Are you taking this too personally?

Like artists, it's easy for entreprenuers to overidentify with their work. There's a tendency to think that the bank or the customer is rejecting you and judging you personally as inadequate. In actuality, most business rejections have less to do with you than with the circumstances. If you can remain sufficiently detached you're more likely to ascertain the actual circumstances and steps to take next.

Are you being realistic?

Selling yourself, your product, or your service is often a numbers game. What looks like rejection may simply be a matter of statistics. For example, novices at selling are often surprised to learn that there is a sales/rejection ratio for most businesses. For example, it will take a certainnumber of calls to get an appointment and a certain number of appointments to get a sale. Only experience will determine what your ratio is.

Do you know that some business people routinely say no at first simply to determine if the person will pursue the issue?

And you would be amazed at how many people change their mind after talking with you for a while. Times change. Circumstances change? We've come to hear "no" as meaning "not now."

What can you celebrate right now?

It can be hard to keep moving ahead when you encounter one rejection after another. There's no reward for your efforts. So we've learned to celebrate every milestone along the way to our goals. Success is a process. If you wait to congratulate yourself until the end, they'll be nothing left to celebrate. So celebrate the calls you make, the opportunities you get, the progress you make.

Who thinks you're great?

One of the antidotes for the fear of rejection is a little support from your friends. When you'refeeling your worst, ask yourself, "Who thinks I'm great? Who always believes in me?" And get together with them fast. When you get thank-you letters or notes of appreciation from friends or customers, save them. Put them in a "stroke file." At times when you're getting a lot of no's, get out those notes and remind yourself there are people who value and appreciate your work.

Can you take matters into your own hands?

Nothing can finish off a venture more effectively than having to wait endlessly for someone else's okay to get under way. Entertainers and writers usually face this type of chronic rejection. The successful ones don't wait for someone to discover them. They find someway to perform. If you can't seem to get a bid, volunteer to do a project for someone who could influence your future customers.