It was only after her husband's death that Suvarna realised the extent to which people disregarded the armed forces. Her husband, Major Prakash Patil, was killed by Bodo insurgents in the hills of Assam. ``Not many know the tensions that we face, we keep thinking all the while that the life of a family member is at stake,'' said Suvarna.

She was speaking at a gathering of `Friends of Defence Families' organised by Anand Saraf, convenor of the Indian Border and Motorcycle expedition. Suvarna's six-year-old son Abhijeet and her parents were also present.

Saying that in her husband's death ``the nation lost an officer with a promising career,'' Suvarna recounted that the Major was a member of the 58th batch of the National Defence Academy, Khadakwasala, andwas commissioned in the Madras Regiment in June 1991. He was part of the United Nations Peacekeeping Force in Namibia and was posted in Bihar.

In Hatigarh region of lower Assam, Major Patil was killed in a counter-assault by Bodo extremists, when he was on his way back to the base camp after capturing two Bodo insurgents. Today, it is not just the public apathy towards the risky lives led by defence personnel that has irked Suvarna. She is also disillusioned about the scanty resources employed by the members of the polity for tackling secessionists' activities.