But let me get back to the original issue. Ah, yes. Ahmedabad, Pokharan, the heat. Never have I looked forward to the morning paper as now. Life has not been the same after May 11 -- not for me, not for Pokharan either.

I fervently look forward to reading the reactions of people both common and uncommon, of scientists both for and against, of politicians both happy and troubled and, of course, heads of state -- both friends and adversaries.

It's amazing how many (chain) reactions a nuclear test can have. The common man here blames the N-testing for the steadily rising mercury and points to a particular spot in the deserts of Rajasthan. But the finger is not disapproving or accusing. It shakes with a proud sense ofachievement. For Pokhran has transcended its previous status of a mere N-test site. It is a teerth sthal now -- albeit one that is highly and heavily guarded, leaving no scope whatsoever for a darshan.

While 90 per cent of Indians are reportedly happy with the nuke rebuke, many belonging to the fraternity that made May 11 possible believe the tests were ``not good and not done in a proper manner.'' These scientists feel we have lost more than we have achieved. Meanwhile, others are convinced it was a deed well done and not a minute ahead of time, what with Ghauri and all that.

Of course, the politicians: while some are hogging the limelight others are demanding and begging by turns for a piece of it. While some claim to have successfully embossed the words `nuclear weapons state' on the collective conscience of the Five Pandavas, others feels it was an opportunistic ploy to deflect criticism on the home front.

But the most amazing -- almost rabid -- reaction has come from the so-called FirstWorld nations, the class monitors of School Earth. Most have treated this nation, with a history more extensive than all of theirs put together, with the disdain that `tenners' in school reserve for fifth-graders. I mean, imagine Australia, which can be proud of nothing more than kangaroos, screaming, ``We are utterly disgusted... India needs to be punished.'' Punished? Did I hear right? Shall all 800-plus million of us write each of our names 800 million times or what? Or would each of us be caned individually in their kangaroo court -- the highest number of strokes being reserved for Abdul Kalam, Chidambaram and Vajpayee (not necessarily in that order)? And how can we forget the great Uncle Sam? First he makes us wear Lee jeans, saying they are the best in the world. Then he teaches us to eat Big Macs and wash 'em down with Coke. And then, all of a sudden, he threatens to make us all as poor as Uncle Tom in his shabby little cabin. Midway into a speech Clinton imposes sanctions on India. Others butobviously follow suit.

If we have gone `berserk', others are in urgent need of a really strong dose of diazepam. It's bad, people say, to make value judgments. And frankly, the testing might have been proper or improper, right or wrong, a need or a nuisance. But one thing is for sure, and PC be damned -- even after all these years, 3000 of civilisation and 50 of Independence -- we are still treated by those who matter either patronisingly or condescendingly. Always ready to pounce, dismiss, condemn or impose sanctions.

Know what, Mr Vajpayee? Good job, and congratulations to you. Just a point, though. You have shown them that we can triumph over their surveillance. Now let's show them that we can triumph over poverty and hunger, unemployment and corruption too. Because more than Pakistan attacking us, I am bothered about another farmer committing suicide in some barren Andhra field. What say you?