England's World Cup footballers, in contrast, seem incapable of hitting a ball straight from 12 yards, let alone bending one into the corner with the outside of a boot. They have become so inept at it that the author of The Goalkeeper's Fear of the Penalty might consider adding brackets at the end of the title with the words: Except Against England.

The sight of one waddling up to take a penalty kick in a shoot-out is the most terrifying vision for fans: Waddle, of course, as in Chris, who set a benchmark for incompetence with his effort against West Germany in the 1990 World Cup semi-finals, which went so high and wide thatit is possibly still in orbit. Stuart Pearce having already missed, Waddle's wayward missile was the last English effort of those 1990 finals. In Euro 96, Gareth Southgate did not so much take a penalty as roll it at the German keeper to end another final dream. And last week, against Belgium, Les Ferdinand was one of the culprits as England failed in another shoot-out.

Incredibly, only two of the England 22 took penalties in the Premiership last season; one hit the target. Teddy Sheringham lost the job at Manchester United after missing three out of three. Michael Owen scored two, against Wimbledon at Selhurst Park on the opening day and at Aston Villa in February, and missed against Arsenal at Anfield last month.

So who will take penalties for England this time? Ferdinand and Sheringham will not be keen and it would be asking a lot of young Owen. Perhaps Tony Adams, the old donkey who has changed into a goalscoring attacking defender under Arsene Wenger at Arsenal, will fancy himself in another new roleas penalty-taker.

If it goes to the wire again, Glenn Hoddle may regret not taking the one player in England who finds penalty-taking as easy as Besty did. He may have many other failings but he is on a run of 25 successful penalties which has taken his career record to 46 successes from 47 kicks. Step forward, or rather do not, Matt Le Tissier.

Observer News Service